Asking For What You’re Worth

“There are three kinds of pipe. There’s what you have, which is garbage – and you can see where that’s gotten you. There’s bronze, which is pretty good, unless something goes wrong. And something always goes wrong. Then, there’s copper, which is the only pipe I use. It costs money. It costs money because it saves money.” ~ from the movie Moonstruck

When you are an entrepreneur of any kind, one thing you have to do, sooner or later, is  set your price. If you are selling a product, this may be a little bit easier than if you are selling a service. When pricing a service, however, many people struggle with asking for what they are worth. Coaches, consultants, virtual assistants, designers, organizers, writers, artists, chefs, speakers, etc. must all, at some point, take an unflinching look at what they are worth. Which may or may not be very different from what they think people are willing to pay for their services.

Often, I work with clients on their fees. Many undervalue themselves.  And, rarely, I see someone who has an over-inflated sense of their value. (These people are usually in their chosen profession for the money, rather than to offer value.) Finally, there is the occasional person who is comfortable with asking a fair price for what they are worth. So, how do we become that person, if we aren’t already?

There are several simple steps to asking for, and receiving what you are worth. First, do your homework and find out the general ballpark of fees and pricing structure for comparable businesses. Next, pick a dollar amount that you can believe in, and that does not undervalue you, your experience, or the profession. When someone asks what you charge, tell them with confidence (no apologies, or instant discounts or deal making needed) and then – and this is the biggie – politely ask them for their business. It can be something like “When would you like to begin?” Too often, people forget this important, critical step.

One bold way of setting your fees is to pick a number you feel comfortable with, and then double it. Once, I came across the fees of a coach I greatly admire. Her fees were SO high, they felt like Monopoly money. And, to top it off, she required a 6 month commitment. Looking at the number, I went (and pretty quickly, I might add) from laughing off the ridiculously high number to trying to figure out how I could make it work. Even though I didn’t hire her at that time, it was a valuable lesson for me in asking what you are worth. We can be too quick to make up stories to ourselves that revolve around “They can’t afford me.”

One client of mine had a major revelation today which was that she was more comfortable initiating the “money conversation” than waiting with fear for her potential client to ask. She’s right, of course. When we can be proactive and calm, this conversation just goes better. She had practiced what she felt comfortable asking for, so she didn’t get tongue-tied in the moment.

If you are experienced,  at some point you will want to raise your fees. It has been said that the perfect time to do this is when you are doing all the business you can handle. One litmus paper test for me is when I hear a brand new coach or two asking  almost as much as I am charging, and me with 10 years experience, and multiple credentials.

The last time I raised my rates ( finally!) I remember clearly how I felt the first time I said the new rate aloud for a potential client. After I told her my (new) fee, it got really quiet. That is, if you don’t count her quick intake of breath. Or, maybe it was mine. When she finally spoke she said, “Wow, that is really a premium rate! You must be worth it. Let’s begin!!”

Music to my ears…

Real VS Perceived Value

 “Preference, by L’ Oréal,” she says, “Because I’m worth it!” ~ old     L’ Oréal commercials, from the ’80s and ’90s

Picture a beautiful woman tossing her shining, lustrous locks as she says that. Smiling for the camera, and letting us know that she has chosen the more expensive line of home hair coloring products because, well, she’s worth it. Brilliant in their simplicity and use of words that many people may have said beforehand, these ads so dominated our consciousness that it was hard to escape them. That was the whole idea from the marketing geniuses at the L’Oréal Group, which is the world’s largest cosmetics and beauty company.

The fact that all these years later we still see parodies and even cartoons of these ads speaks to how much we consumed the message. So, what does it mean to us, when faced with a spending decision? And, when is value for a more expensive product or service the bigger bargain? It may be a better value because the product itself is worth more, and will out perform the cheaper item. Or, even though it is more expensive, in the long run  we will get more use from it.

For example, say you go shopping and find a jacket. It is stylish, everyone is wearing one like it, and a steal at $30. So you buy it, take it home and wear it once. Thing is, it turns out to be uncomfortable, the sleeves are a little too short, it bunches up uncomfortably and the color makes you look like death warmed over. Oh well, at least it was cheap, you tell yourself years later when you finally donate it to charity. Now, suppose you saw another coat you absolutely fell in love with for $600. It is warm, soft, cozy and the color makes you come alive. You gulp, cave in and buy it. From the very first time you wear it, you feel special, people comment on how great you look in the coat, and it becomes your signature piece for the season. In fact, you love it so much, you wear it almost every day that winter, say 60 times. And is still looks good enough to wear and love again next winter. Cost per wearing? A mere $10 and still being worn, as compared to the “bargain you “stole”for $30 and wore once. Which one is the bigger bargain now?

As long as we are not breaking the bank, which I am NOT advising anyone to do, why not examine the  true value of things? Another example is my happy flower habit. I love to have fresh flowers indoors, and have them in several locations in my home. Recently, I have begun buying live flowering plants instead of cut flowers. Before, I would spend around $5 for the cheap Trader Joe’s flower bunches that may or may not last a week. But, in the beginning of May, I treated myself to a fabulous large orchid plant for $20. Now at almost 8 weeks, it looks as beautiful as the day I brought it home – no – more beautiful because some of the buds have blossomed. Even if it only lasts 2 more weeks, I still will only have spent $2 a week, less that half the price of the cut flowers. And, bonus, I will still have the living plant, that may bloom again in the future.

Real value VS perceived value – we get to choose, so choose wisely and authentically. Who’s the savvy shopper now?

How Inviting is your Invitation?

“Say what you mean and mean what you say.” ~ Anonymous 

Yesterday I received an email from a local yarn shop that I visit once or twice a year. It’s kind of a trek from where I live, so  there needs to be a compelling reason for me to visit. A yarn sale would definitely qualify, for these are rare in the world of fine knitting yarns. This email flyer mentions briefly that there is a sale, lost somewhere in the middle of the text. The wording wasn’t warm and welcoming, and didn’t entice me to drop by for a visit.

In fact, since I don’t shop there often, I have no idea what “insatiable knitter’s cards” even are. Would they REALLY accept chocolate as payment? Birthday Party? When, and who is Diane? What this did was make me feel was kind of excluded – like when everybody knows the in-jokes and I don’t. I’m not a part of their inner circle. (Yarn shops can be very elitist; that is, if you don’t hang out there often, knitting and chatting, taking classes, etc., you are an outsider. Sometimes, you even have to climb over the regulars who are hanging out to see the merchandise.)

Now, I know that was the last thing in the world this excited  yarn shop with the birthday wants their customers to feel. They would love it if their shop was bursting at the seams all weekend. At least I am guessing it is all weekend, because they also didn’t list their store hours.

Even though we often have the best of intentions, perhaps taking a closer look at how we invite our customers and clients to interact with us is a good idea. We may be sending mixed signals, and driving them away inadvertently.

The words that left me (out in the) cold?

“Happy Friday everyone! We are very excited to continue our birthday celebration today. We can’t wait to see all of you in today to see what goodies you pick up! Disclaimer: * Alright girl’s here the little details. All Yarn, books, bags, kits are on sale. Needles are excluded as well as any previous layaway items as well as held items. All purchases are FINAL.  We accept everything, Cash, Check or Charge even chocolate. No signatures on insatiable knitter’s cards will be given. No additional discounts will be given. If you need your yarn wound, please bring it back at a later date. We’d love to wind it for you. If you need knitting help during this time, you are welcome to call make an appointment, or sign up for our wonderful, community recognized classes. We look forward to seeing you all tomorrow for our birthday party, please be sure to RSVP with Diane!”

Don’t Get Burned!

“My candle burns at both ends; it will not last the night.” ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay

Sometimes, more isn’t better, it’s just more. Especially when we are passionate about the work that we do, as well as our other interests, it can be hard to know when we have crossed into the realm of burning the candle at both ends. A  great idea may take on a life of it’s own, we have a deadline that seems impossible to meet, or maybe a family situation that needs extra time and attention, and we can fall off balance. It becomes harder to say “no”  and to delegate to others. We may begin to lose our effectiveness, so things actually take longer to accomplish. (I will say I am feeling a little bit crispy at about this point. Not burned out yet, just crispy.)

We may make excuses or even hide the fact we are working so hard. Of course, there does come a point when other people notice. Some will support us however they can, some will worry, some will complain or argue that we shouldn’t work so hard, some will be disdainful that we can’t get our work done in a reasonable time, and there will even be a few that will be jealous of all that we do accomplish.

Does what anyone else thinks matter in the long run? As a recovering workaholic myself, what really matters is how we feel and how we manage our own lives.  While we can burn that candle for a while, sooner or later it will burn down to nothing. And if you are burning it at both ends, it happens faster, and often more dramatically. Think of holding a marshmallow on a stick over a campfire, first it is browning quite nicely – then it becomes crispy – then starts to burn and then – voila!  you are holding a fully engulfed, flaming marshmallow.

Humans are designed to work hard, and then have recovery  time. By that I mean rest, relaxation, time to replenish our tired minds and bodies. When we become depleted and exhausted it takes longer to recover. And, if we reach full burnout, it can take a long time. The dictionary tells us burnout is:

Burnout:  1) the reduction of a fuel or substance to nothing through use or combustion  2) physical or mental collapse caused by overwork or stress 

So, just how can we avoid burnout when we are doing all that we can to live a powerful, purposeful and passionate life? Here are a few suggestions – which may sound simple at first glance. Simple does not necessarily mean easily accomplished:

• Take a break. Get up from your work and move around, take a walk, a nap, or whatever feels right so you can come back refreshed. In an earlier post I talked about the Power of Naps
• Spend a few minutes – make a list and prioritize that list
• Look at that list and for each item either; DO IT, DELEGATE IT, DELAY IT OR DISCARD IT
• Eat foods that nourish your mind and body, and get exercise.
• Find some “ME” time
• Say “NO” more often.
• Ask for help or support when and how you need it.
• Meditate,  take a few deep breaths or just spend time quieting your mind in a way that feels right for you.
• Laugh out loud (this is a great stress reliever!)
• Get enough sleep – whatever your body needs.
• Take a look at your value system. Which value is all of this hard work supporting?
• And of course, remember to be grateful. Whatever the question, gratitude is the answer.
• Set boundaries that feel authentic and meaningful for you.
• Work with a coach

If you find  yourself in a extra busy place in your life, a great question to ask yourself is; “Am I feeling overwhelmed?” When I can notice the difference between feeling “overwhelmed” and feeling just “whelmed,” I know that balance is back in my life.

Now, go on! Get out there and follow your dreams,  work hard, play hard and remember to make time for recovery…

Time Bullies

“Lost time is never found again.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

Have you ever met a Time Bully? You know, someone who has little regard for the time we spend waiting for them. They may be wonderful people in many other ways, but this is definitely not one of their finer attributes.

Here’s an example – A couple of weeks ago, a company I work with called an important meeting for some of their employees, coaches and consultants. Everyone was there, except the guest (not with the company) who was coming in to do the presentation. We waited, and waited. Finally, we got word that she was “running a little bit late.”  She arrived 15 minutes late, and it took another 15 minutes to set up her equipment. A half-hour gone. Many of us had rearranged our schedules to be there. Midway through her ill-prepared spiel, she let us know that this information only pertained to a portion of us  and that the rest of us could see our information in a webinar tomorrow (when many of us already have appointments) . Because she failed to communicate clearly, we have squandered 1 hour and 40 minutes so far, and still have no real information. In other words, she bullied us into waiting for her, and rearranging our schedules, which  impacted everyone negatively. The case could even be pretty easily made, that she cost the company  two valuable resources – time and money.

It’s frustrating to be kept waiting. And of course, no matter how well-intended we are, there will be times when we are time bullies ourselves. Hopefully, not too often…

How do Time Bullies show up in  your life? How do you deal with them? When have YOU been a time bully yourself?

More than a Pulse and a Paycheck

There is so much talk about finding your perfect, ideal client, your niche, your target market – and how it can help you standout in a vast field of other entrepreneurs and coaches trying to be unique. All to often, when I speak about identifying these clients to “new” coaches, they are afraid to really commit to such a narrow share of the market. “I just want to coach!” “I can coach anybody.” “I don’t want to leave anyone out.” These are some of their battle cries.

While it is true we can work with many people, even those outside our target market, why not spend our time, energy and resources to find, identify and engage people who we really want to work with? And, in an area that truly lights us up. When we can identify who those people are, what their likes and dislikes are, what are their challenges, joys, and even their world view, we begin the process of natural selection. Which might mean letting go so some business relationships that are draining us. Trust me, this makes room for the ideal people to find us.

For example, I work with people that are “ready, willing and able to do whatever it takes to move toward their goals and dreams.” If they aren’t ready to make this kind of commitment, they are not my ideal client. And guess what? I can honestly say that this description fits each and every client I have. If they don’t  they will either not step up or drop out. That’s fine, because it makes room for the people who really want to create something wonderful for themselves and their lives.

The more clear we become on who our ideal client is and who our target market is, the easier it is to find them, and the easier they will find us. Not only is this a question of niche, but also values, passions and levels of integrity. Believe me, your ideal client is so much more that someone with a pulse and a paycheck!!

What would it take to fully commit to working with a focused target of people who are ready to roll up their sleeves and really do the work?

The Taxman Cometh

“It’s a very simple truth.  Yet some men find it difficult to understand.  They get angry when time for payment comes.  Never ask for a soda unless you are prepared to pay the check.” ~ Somebody Up There Likes Me 1956

The countdown is happening – 10 days before taxes are due for this year! About now, it seems, everyone is complaining about having to pay taxes. Nothing new here. While most of us have had negative money feelings periodically in the past, this year can be different. We can choose to whine about what we owe, of course. This time of year, it’s kind of the National Pastime. Or, we can look at things from a much bigger perspective. No matter what, it is inevitable that we will pay taxes. Every year, no matter what. Paying taxes is a sign we have prosperity in one form or another in our lives.

Today brought a visit with my accountant, Beverly, a savvy and smart woman I have been going to for the past several years. As we tallied up my income and expenses, it actually felt wonderful to see that I am earning more that last year doing something I love.Whoo hoo!!  Even though I owe additional money for my taxes this year, I felt relaxed and completely at ease. Accepting, even. Usually when I go to the accountant’s I am so stressed and worried about the amount I may owe I don’t actually enjoy the appointment. Today, my peacefulness felt like a miracle that came out of nowhere. I was able to feel accepting and grateful that my money was going to help the greater good, in some way or another. And, with my new attitude, I was able to have a fabulous additional conversation with Beverly, where she gave me tips and techniques about ways to save for next year. I am motivated to refine my way of tracking expenses for the coming year, and to really embrace the wonderful challenge that is a sign of growth and prosperity within my business. Bring it on!

How can you shift your own thinking about having to pay taxes?

Grateful to Pay Taxes…Really

“A person doesn’t know how much he has to be thankful for until he has to pay taxes on it.”  ~Author Unknown

As I gather all my tax information for my appointment with my accountant tomorrow, it is  gratifying to see that I can do what I love and make a living at it. Paying taxes is a just a way of quantifying how well I am doing. Soooo much to be grateful for…

The Once a Year Flower Frenzy

“The earth laughs in flowers”.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Many years ago, when I was a brand new coach building my business, I worked in a good friend’s flower shop for a week or two at times during the “flower holidays” – Christmas, Easter. Mother’s Day, and – of course – Valentine’s Day. Not only did this help my multiple streams of income and fuel my creativity, I had coached my friend into buying the shop because of her passion for flowers (and her “don’t look back/keep busy plan” after her 32 year marriage crumbled.) Newly divorced form a 30 year marriage myself, I wanted to support her in making her new dream come true, and keep myself busy during those lonely holidays, if I am totally honest.

Everything you have heard about Valentine’s Day being crazy/busy for flower shops is true. What you might not know is that crazy/busy begins a couple of weeks before the big day. Since I didn’t regularly work in the shop, I was that extra set of hands to help out as the regulars got tired and grumpy. I never realized what a physically demanding job being a florist is, especially at holiday time. Long hours standing on their feet, lifting all kinds of heavy things (a couple dozen roses and greens in a glass vase filled with water isn’t light!) snippy customers, and even exhausted coworkers. Oh – and COLD! They have to keep things cold, to extend the life of the flowers. Sometimes I did design and display work, more often taking over the phone calls and directly talking to the customers that came into the shop. This was the part I liked the best, the people part, and being a coach, it was fun to help so many people with the floral portion of their relationships. The whole process just made me happy, and I found myself smiling for no reason.  The deep, noble, everlasting, just beginning, friendly, funny. futile and even unrequited loves all wove into a tapestry as bright as the flowers around me. I even got a couple of clients this way. Talk about non-conventional networking!

On Valentine’s Day, hordes of extra drivers and vans appeared, and flowers were delivered all over town with military precession. People were lined up to purchase and pick up even more flowers. And plants, balloons, cheesy stuffed animals and even chocolates. At the end of the day, there was always such a sense of sweet satisfaction, camaraderie and accomplishment.

The question today is: What unconventional things are you willing to do in support of your own dreams?

Pay It Forward

Recently, a colleague who I greatly respect asked me to do her a favor, one for which I normally receive payment. She wanted – no, insisted – that I be compensated for my time and expertise. Here is an excerpt from the email I sent to her…

There are three forms of payment that I will accept:

1. Donate $$ to the charity of your choice. (bonus if it’s a green or creative one)
2. Have a coaching session with someone you feel could benefit from your great coaching and not be able to afford you.
3. Take a buddy on an adventure and have a fun time on me (this is actually my favorite!!)
4. Also, please pay it forward – help a deserving colleague with a similar request

This was a fun way for me to honor the power of giving and receiving with someone who is a wonderful coach, and will “get” the energy exchange I am proposing. She is a credit to the profession of coaching, and I have the joy of fulfilling her request.  WIN-WIN!

Today’s question is: What can YOU do to pay someone forward?